I Miss Love

I can't say that I don't miss the physical aspects of my relationship with Carmi. After all, I'm a (mostly) healthy (almost) fifteen year old boy with raging hormones. But the physical part of the relationship isn't what I miss most. I miss the feeling of being loved, of knowing that there's somebody who thinks that you're more important than anyone else in the world, of knowing that somebody loves you not because you're... well, you. I've been trying to fill that gap with the old pleasures of video games and action movies and nerdy pursuits like programming. But a game can't love you. A computer can't love you (yet). Also, "'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all." That quote has passed around the internet quite a bit, mostly in end-of-relationship advice. It is usually attributed to Alfred Lord Tennyson. I have to say, I agree with him. Sometimes I envy people who haven't had to go through the pain of losing somebody that they love. But most of the time, I pity them for not having the relationship at all (yet). So many things make more sense now. Even songs and books and movies. I used to just kinda listen to music. Now I hear something and I think, "Yeah, I know how that feels." Being loved is a wonderful feeling. I know that I'll experience it again one day (and hopefully soon), and I can't wait for that day to come.

N.B. For the purpose of this discussion, let's assume that:

1. When I say love I mean romantically.
2. Carmi actually loved me. If she didn't, at least I thought she did.
3. What I felt was actually love. If it wasn't, then replace the word 'love' with whatever emotion you think it was.
4. 'Losing somebody you love' means to the end of a relationship. I've never lost someone that I loved to death, but it seems like it would be both harder and easier at the same time.